Maybe...

The river Seine, nightfall

...I have been so busy trying to plan my life

( that I stopped living it )

...I get so caught up in the ways things are complicated

( that I forget that they don't always have to be )

...writing all those long, rambling letters in the dead of night wasn't the sort of thing I'd done very much before

( but I do it now, just because you wanted to know all about my day )

...it's about time I told you about that one night when I woke beside you and just held your hand and watched you while you slept, a sentinel in the pitch-dark of your troubled dreams

( and I stayed awake until the first light of dawn broke through your window )

...I don't let you know enough how wonderful you look when you smile. As if you're lit from within. You can conquer a room with that smile

( you conquer me )

...you meant it when you said I am ruled by petty passions. Fear. Jealousy. Pride. These things make me cruel

( and I have let them, for I know of no other way to fight for you )

...you were right when you said we didn't make it this far for us to just walk away

...it will take lifetimes to forget you, but even forgetting you is a passion. Where you are concerned, I am vulnerable

I want the reality. I embrace it, with all its sweetness and stings. I want you. Every part of you – not just who you are when things are easy to bear. I will not forfeit that. Even if you are cruel to me